Complete

Hey there, hi there, ho there!

I have fallen behind on my updates. But I vow to keep updating from here on out!

So...what's happened? A lot, actually. I went to see the hepatologist and it turns out that the pain and nausea is all coming from me being so constipated. Gross, right? Perhaps I shouldn't hold it while I'm in public anymore? But, I was instructed to go on a Miralax regimen in which I would take a cap full of it every night. I did that for a month straight in hopes to get some movement of the pooh.

Nothing happened.

I STILL had pain. I met with a GI dude last week who took another xray of my insides and I am still backed up. They decided to bring out the big guns...

medicine for cramps, Stool softener, laxative, COLON CLEANSE!

I prepped myself to do the MoviPrep cleanse this past Saturday night. I mixed the two packets together along with two cold bottles of water and down the hatch it went. It was disgusting. Its a salty-lemony thick liquid. And I must say, the first 2 ounces weren't so bad. About halfway through the bottle you start to ask yourself if maybe having the pooh in your system isn't sooooo bad.

Side note: It was about halfway through where I could feel the mass shift and my pain was MUCH lower. Weird, right?
I waited. I waited about 15 minutes before I had to explode use the bathroom. Nothing major came out. I maybe went 3-4 times total. But certainly nothing that anyone would look at and go, "There must have been SO MUCH POOP inside you!" I don't even think I would have gotten a medal in the Olympics if there was such a thing. But, I would guess my ranking would have been:

1st in urgency
2nd in grace getting up the stairs
3rd in my choice of underwear for the evening

See...I didn't even medal in volume.

I thought by the time I finished my second round of this crap in the morning I would for sure be cleaned out. I didn't evacuate much...which you would think to be a great thing, right? Then last night's cleanse must have worked! But I didn't feel relieved. By Monday morning the pain had returned to its original spot. So I sent over a little message to the doctor who set up another xray. I will go in this afternoon to get another xray done to do a comparison of before/after. I wish I could show the xrays somehow. They are pretty interesting to see!!

So while I still have liver disease, it is not that bad. Its probably something I have been living with for 10 years now but have only now looked into. Its something that I might have to live with for the rest of my life, but certainly nothing to be super scared about. I think the doctor said that its not now that we worry about, its 10 years from now. But I can certainly help with that by getting my weight down and moving more.

Side note: If ONE MORE DOCTOR says that I need to exercise more and eat better, I'm going to blow.


 So everything is really positive. I like that. Lots of great things to look forward to! I have an appointment with a metabolic specialist next week to help me with why I cannot lose weight and then a follow up appointment the week after that with Doctor P on how I have been doing with weightloss (!!!) and such. Once September rolls around, I should know a lot on where I stand physically and I cannot wait.

September is PCOS Awareness month! I made a little badge in celebration! Yay!

Pain: 3.5

I promise

I promise to do a more complete update soon! But for now, I am just going to post my workout plan for this coming month (August...already!?!?!)

Living with PCOS on the surface, doesn't seem too awful. But when you start to pick apart everything, it can get overwhelming. Such as losing weight. This topic, I feel, will always been at the top of my list to talk about because I just.can't.do.it. I eat well, I exercise 5 times a week but nothing happens. SO....I'm going to be adding more weight resistance to my routines (my own body weight!). Here is what my plan will be!

Click to make larger

Daunting, I know. I figure if I pair this with my cardio, which consists of running at LEAST a mile and to be moving for a 5k, I should come out ahead. But what do I know?




Pain: 3

Twas the night before....

Tomorrow is the day! I'm SO anxious. And since I have quit smoking, eating badly and drinking, I'm not quite sure what to do with my nerves. I guess I went at my nails today. Just watch, I'll wake up tomorrow morning to ,"This just in! Biting nails causes cancer!" Ha! That would be my luck, though. I don't have the best of luck with......well, anything.  But I did work out some nerves at the gym. I think that will have to be my output from now on.

I'm not quite sure what kind of appointment tomorrow really is to be honest. What I think will happen is he/she will feel around my and let me know if I need a biopsy or not. I'm not quite sure what else will be said/done considering there really isn't a cure for liver disease. 

Whatever the doctor(s) say, I will post on here. I know I have some family reading this (Hey, peeps!) so I know this is a good way to keep updated. 

Wish me luck!! 

No, seriously. I have the worst luck.

Nausea: 1

Pain: 3.25

Crap bag

Man, I have to say....this liver thing can be a real bitch. Like, steal your husband, run over your dog and pants you in front of a large crowd kind of bitch.

Thursday was probably the worst it has been so far. The nausea was at levels I have never experienced before. The only thing I could do to help ease it was to kind of keep moving my feet. Its like when you get drunk and have the spins - sometimes the only thing that will help is if you move around to offset it. So I dealt with that from about noon up until I went to bed that night. Friday I was dealing with the pain side of it. I had bouts of nausea throughout the day, but it was mainly "sore" feeling.

I just don't understand why this came on SO quickly. I remember on the 22nd of May this year (my 3rd wedding anniversary!) that we were going to go out to eat to celebrate and that was the first time I felt the nausea. Its not even two full months later and I feel it almost everyday now. Why is this happening so quickly? Why does it hurt so much now? It feels like I've gone from 0-60 in record time.

I have my hepatologist appointment this Tuesday. I'm not quite sure what they will be able to determine from this appointment, but I'm hoping that I walk out of there with some questions answered. I'm a huge ball of nerves and I just want some relief!!!!!

Nausea: 3.5

Pain: 2.5

FroNo

FroYo = OhNo.

I just got back from getting FroYo. I don't understand why I do it. I KNOW that my liver and FroYo do not mix. At all. Yet, anytime somebody mentions it, I go nuts and have to have it. Its my crack!!!

So I have to just sit here while my liver tries to digest this and feel the sugar rush through my body. Its not a good feeling. I spend 95% of my time avoiding sugar and when I actually do get some, it surges through my body making me feel sick.

I'm sorry, liver. Lesson learned.




Liver Pain: 4.5

Drinking

With Liver disease, I'm not suppose to drink (duh) and I can sometimes get real down about it.....such as last night. 

Last night was GORGEOUS outside. It was 79 degrees and I swear, every neighbor was outside having drinks and shootin' the shit. It was fun to look down the line of houses to see. The neighbors who live on the other side of our duplex are going through health issues with one of their Dads, so we were all just sitting outside talking about that. Since I have personally lost both of my parents, it was nice to be able to kind of help someone through this process of, "Is he going to be ok? What do we do now? What can I do for them?"

I could tell that everyone was getting a little tipsy. Which is fine, they have a right to do that, but I WANTED TO DRINK, TOO! I felt like a kid that saw somebody else holding a toy and now all of a sudden they wanted to have that toy, too. I wanted to be able to numb my resurfacing feelings about ailing parents, too. I wanted to be able to drink away my problems! I wanted to be able to FOR ONE NIGHT drink away my problems and forget about everything. 

But I can't. I never will be able to do that again. Ever. 

I can start to get real down on myself if I think too much about it, which is what I did last night. I wasn't feeling the best anyway (liver flare up), so I excused myself and went to bed. And while I was laying in bed while everyone else was drinking downstairs I started thinking, "Will I ever be okay being around it? Will I always feel left out?" And I think it is like dieting; You might have to ask your friends and family not to eat  certain foods in front of you because you are not strong enough to resist yet. But eventually it will be okay.

I am able to have a drink once every 3 months so I am excited to be going to my hometown in a couple of weeks for a friends 30th birthday celebration to be able to have my one drink for the summer. Hopefully that will help me feel more in place. But I'm starting to get obsessive about it. My mind is going nuts.

"What should I have? Should I have a mixed drink? Nah, that will get all watered down"
"Should I have a beer? That may get too warm if I'm sipping on it all night."
"I'm going to sneak shots all night! RUM CHATA! GET SHITTY!!"
"No, no, I'm not."

"Wine. I can sip o that all night. Wine it is."

"Red? Or maybe a Chardonnay?"
"Red. Yes, red."

So I will, with pleasure, sip my ONE glass of wine all night long. I don't need alcohol to have fun!!!

Right?

Liver Pain: 3

Weight Loss with PCOS

With SO MANY topics to cover with these stupid diseases, its hard to know what/where to start. But I think the topic I most want to talk about right now is the weight loss.

Its hard. Like, really hard you guys.

Like I said before in a previous post (well, really the ONLY post prior to this), my body clings onto carbohydrates. Its like my body is the cool kid of the party and everybody (fats, sugars) just want to hang around me and get stupid drunk. And with being insulin resistant, its not cool to be the life of the party.

This is how I picture the fats and sugars in my body. Look at him..
he's so cute! All goofy and green. He even brought a
suitcase to camp out in my body! Awww.

I've been in a nice stretch of time now (3-4 months) of doing low carb. I haven't dropped but 3 pounds. Its so.frustrating. I think my sugar-free pudding and cool whip lite are the culprits of this. I only have one to two little portions of that a day...but maybe it is enough to throw a wrench into my diet?I brought this up with Doctor P and she said that possibly the dairy is the reason why I am not reacting to the diet. 

So let me get this straight.......you want me to do low carb, gluten free, AND dairy free? What am I suppose to eat? No, seriously....what am I suppose to eat? I eat chicken almost daily, I eat veggies, I get plenty of water, I limit my (diet) soda, and I try to stay away from red meat. I have omelets for breakfast with lean turkey and some cheese. Its a pretty clean diet. Where am I going astray? 


I think what I have to remember is that these things take time and I am not 22 anymore. Even three years ago I was able to lose 20lbs for my wedding by eating what I am now (without working out, too!). But I am working out now. I run at least a mile a day....


.....say whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?


I was never a runner. Nor did I EVER want to be. Ever. But things change. Within this year I have stopped smoking, stopped eating carbs, stopped drinking, stopped living life. Jk, jk. I think I am *finally* beginning to live life. 






Liver pain: 2.5